Revolving Door Malfoy
by anime-is-dumb
Summary: I can't believe I'm hearing from Revolving Door Malfoy of all people that, apart from me, my family is nothing but a bunch of perverts and tarts.


This little short story solely exists as my first attempt to write something requiring an 'M' rating. The only actual sex is right at the beginning, though.

I do not own Harry Potter or any of it's characters. I just like to put them in silly situations.

* * *

_The Head's common room was filled with the sounds and scents of sex as Head Boy, well-known Lothario, and proud Ravenclaw Scorpius Malfoy and his red-headed partner leaned over one of the sofas, aggressively pursuing mutual coital bliss. _

_As he continued to thrust slowly from behind, one hand gently but firmly pulling her long hair and the other reaching around her hip, gently but persistently tweaking her most sensitive spot, Scorpius leaned down further so he could alternate between breathing lightly on her ear and kissing her sensitive spots on and around her neck. _

_It worked. A sound much like sobbing invaded her already heavy breathing, she began to make noises in broken sounds and word fragments. _

_Behind her, Scorpius grinned wolfishly. Experience had taught him that a woman who couldn't even approach coherence was truly in ecstasy. The ones who screamed 'YES YES YES! OH MERLIN!' and other ridiculous things during their 'orgams' were the ones faking it for whatever reason._

_And this girl was definitely not faking. _

"_I-oh! No! Scor-ah! Hah-hah-hah-uuuuaaahhh! I'm...I'm...No, stop! Uh-uh-uuuh-NNNNNNGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!" _

_Was her response as he adjusted his finger tweaking and slightly moved his thrusting uptempo. As her orgasm overtook her he was rewarded with the glorious sensation of her quivering walls clamping tightly around him and a small flood of wet warmth that he felt leave her in shuddering waves, dampening his cock._

_It was enough to drive Scorpius over the edge as well. _

"_UUUUUUUAAAAHHH!" he groaned as he absolutely lost control of his body and his senses for a second, his entire body going rigid as he completely buried himself and released his fluid into her._

_As the man and woman leaned forward onto the sofa in one tangled mass and attempted to catch their breath, they weren't expecting...._

* * *

Rose Weasley, 7th year Gryffindor and Head Girl of Hogwarts grumbled to herself as she made the trek to the Head's dorm.

Her idiot roommate and fellow Head had not shown up at the meeting between the Heads and the prefects of every house in the main hall of Hogwarts. She'd been forced to conduct the meeting herself and had every intention of tearing Scorpius Malfoy a new one as soon as she found him.

As she snarled out the password (_'Monty Python!')_ and threw open the portrait, she had possibly expected to find Scorpius lounging on one of the sofas, reading a book and looking smug. That, or locked in the Head Boy's room, shagging this week's girl. He wasn't known as _Revolving Door Malfoy_ (to Rose, at least) for nothing, after all.

What she hadn't expected to find was Scorpius and her cousin Lily Potter, half-laying on the sofa in a tangle of limbs, Scorpius still clearly buried to the hilt in Lily. If their sweaty bodies and heavy breathing didn't give away what had transpired between them, the wave of sex fumes that overtook Rose certainly did.

Rose looked shocked for a second, before she began to yell.

* * *

...for Rose Weasley to burst through the door right at that moment, looking furious.

"What the bloody hell is all this, then?!" shrieked an obviously shocked Rose.

Lily was obviously still completely out of it, still riding on the feeling of her orgasm, but from her position on the couch, she was able to breathe out a quiet "Hi, Rosie." before putting her head back down and continuing to catch her breath.

Scorpius merely sighed and dismounted Lily, earning a small groan of disappointment from her, before turning to Rose, completely disregarding his own nudity.

"What does it look like, Weasel?" sneered Scorpius as he crossed his arms and glared at Rose, annoyance at the disruption of his afterglow period with Lily clear on his face.

Rose's nose wrinkled in what was either irritation at Scorpius, disgust at the smell permeating the room, or both. She glared at Scorpius before turning back to her younger cousin.

Lily was now lying with her head on the arm of the sofa, clutching a pillow and rather indelicately allowing Scorpius' emissions to flow out of her and onto the sofa cushions. A very noticeable flush was painted across her face and torso, made even more obvious by the glistening sweat that covered her.

Rose decided that she wasn't done chewing out Malfoy, but she certainly couldn't stay in the common room any more. Looking past Scorpius, her eyes settled on the slightly ajar door into his private quarters. She roughly grabbed him by the arm and shoved him through.

"Move it, Malfoy!"

"Agh! Hey!" protested Malfoy as she shoved him. "Now you want a go?"

Rose gagged. "Don't flatter yourself, Malfoy."

As she threw him into his room, she turned to face him, but immediately had to look away upon taking in his sweaty body and his cock that remained covered in a combination of his fluids and Lily's, her embarrassment at his nudity finally overtaking her.

"Merlin's sake, Malfoy! Cover yourself!"

Scorpius grabbed a towel from his private bath and wrapped it around his waist. "Just what is your problem now, Weasel."

"Well, before I came in here I was mad that you had abandoned the prefect's meeting. Now I'm pissed off that the reason you blew that off is because YOU WERE SHAGGING MY COUSIN ON A COUCH IN THE COMMON ROOM! What the fuck is wrong with you, Malfoy?!"

Scorpius sneered. "My sex life is none of your business, Weasley."

"It certainly becomes by business when you're fucking my relatives right out in the open, you bloody wanker! Just what were you thinking?"

"For starters Weasley, I'll admit that I was in the wrong for doing that in the common room. I'm afraid things got overheated long before we thought to get behind closed doors."

Rose scowled. "You're also in the wrong for bringing my family up here to shag."

"Who I have sex with is none of your concern, Weasel."

"Lily is only a fifth year! And you're head boy! This is exactly the kind of behavior you shouldn't be engaging in!"

Scorpius crossed his arms. "Lily is more than old enough to decide whether or not she wants to have sex. I can assure you that she didn't come here looking for help on her transfiguration homework. And she won't be back up here tomorrow looking for some cuddling and a Hogsmeade date either."

Rose chanced a glance out the door. Her cousin seemed to have recovered from her earlier activities, and after _scourgifying_ herself and the sofa, appeared to be looking for her panties.

After a moment of fruitless search, she simply _accio'd_ them and began to get dressed.

"But she's only 16! You could get her pregnant, you could..."

"Weasel, just because you're more innocent than Rick Creevey, doesn't mean that the rest of your family is."

"Don't talk about my family!"

"You may be shocked to find out that Lily knows more contraceptive charms and potions than I do."

Rose growled, but was interrupted by her now fully-clothed cousin entering Scorpius' dorm.

"Thanks for a wonderful time Scorpius." she said as she blew him a kiss from the doorway. Scorpius merely caught it and smiled.

"Anytime, love. Anytime."

"I may have to take you up on that." replied Lily before turning to Rose.

"You look a little tense, Rosie. Perhaps you ought to give Scorpius's broom a test flight." she winked before flouncing out of Scorpius' room and out of the Head's dorm.

Rose blushed and looked mortified, before groaning and rubbing her temples. "Ugh. I can't believe my cousin is going to just parade through Hogwarts in 'I-just-got-my-brains-shagged-out' mode. She didn't even bother to fix her hair! What happened to my cute little Lily who had her hair in pigtails and was content to fawn over Quidditch stars?"

"And just think, she's one of the more reserved members of your family."

Rose's head snapped up. "What?!"

Malfoy smirked. "Your lack of knowledge of Hogwart's best shag spots is obvious, Weasley. If you knew about them, you'd almost certainly have seen something on one of your patrols by now. I've certainly had some rather interesting patrols involving your family."

"Oh really?"

"Oh yes. I was quite shocked when I opened the 3rd floor potions room door last month during my 1 AM patrol and found your cousin Roxanne in a rather compromising situation with Angus McClaggen _AND_ Marcella DiPasquale."

Rose paled.

"Lucky man, that McClaggen. Two birds at the same time. Most men would need a million galleons to hook that up." Scorpius whistled. Rose just scowled.

"And your cousin Albus! Wow. Just last week, I caught him doing something you _wouldn't believe_ with Azalea Parkinson behind the tapestries near the kitchen. I suspect neither of them could walk straight for a week!"

Rose just groaned and put her head in her hands.

"What's wrong, Weasel?"

"Ugh. I can't believe I'm hearing from _Revolving Door Malfoy_ of all people that, apart from me, my family is made of nothing but perverts and tarts." she groaned.

"They're only doing what normal people like to do." shrugged Malfoy as he followed Rose out of his room and into the commons, still clad in only his towel.

"Normal people do not jump from partner to partner like you, Malfoy. How many girls have you hurt, I wonder?" snapped Rose as she conspicuously sat down on the sofa that _hadn't _just been used as a shagging platform by Scorpius and Lily.

"I'll have you know, _Rosie, _that I've never shagged a girl who was in a relationship with another man, or shagged a girl while in a relationship with another. I'm not completely slimy. Just a little slimy, that's all." replied Scorpius with a wink.

"Pffft. You've never had a real relationship with anyone." Rose bit back.

It was the truth. Though, only Scorpius really knew why it was true. He was looking at the reason right now.

"And Albus with Parkinson...just...yuck! Everyone knows she's the biggest tart in all of Gryffindor."

Now Scorpius frowned a bit. He may not have been a saint, but he believed in fair judgment of character. "Now that isn't fair, Weasel. You know as well as I do that Parkinson may be a total flirt, but she's never gone any further with a boy than some casual snogging. Her eyes have been on Albus alone since first year. In fact, when I caught them, I was so pleased that they'd finally gotten together that I didn't even deduct house points. Don't take your anger out on them."

Rose frowned because she knew Malfoy was right. "I'm still just completely repulsed that _Revolving Door Malfoy_ has gotten his disgusting perverted claws into my family." muttered Rose.

"It wasn't my _claws_ that got into her, Weasel. Besides, at least I have a door. All you've got is a brick wall with a sign that says 'No Loitering'."

Rose fumed silently. But was then taken aback by a sudden Malfoy invasion into her personal space.

"I think your cousin may be right." said Scorpius as he put his hands on the sofa on either side of Rose's hips, and brought his face very close to hers.

"About what?" asked Rose as she unsuccessfully tried to back up against the sofa. She was slightly overwhelmed by both the view and the masculine – and surprisingly appealing – scent that surrounded her.

"You really are a bit too tense, Rosie. Maybe a test flight or two is exactly what you need. I don't believe I've ever seen you with a boy, not even for a quick snog." winked Scorpius.

"I take my studies very seriously!" was Rose's quick, embarrassed reply. Scorpius was right, after all.

It was her way of saying she'd never been that close to a man.

"It's a shame." said Malfoy before leaning closer to whisper in her ear.

"_You've always intrigued me, Rose. You're the only girl at Hogwarts who I'd be willing to give up my revolving door policy for."_

Rose shuddered with pleasure at his breath and her eyes widened at his words.

As Malfoy stood up, he pierced her eyes with his own. "I'd get a regular door, and only you would have the key." he said quietly as he continued to gaze.

Rose's heart was racing. It was only reasonable that in the most basic hormonal and physical sense, a fit man like Scorpius Malfoy could make her blood boil, even if she found him repulsive otherwise. She understood what he was saying. But, she was wary, and decided that if Hogwarts' shameless serial-shagger wanted to anywhere near her, in _any_ sense of the word, much less what he was suggesting, he'd have to really work for it. As things stood now, she wasn't even willing to be his friend.

As she got herself under control, Rose stood up and placed a hand on Scorpius' chest to push him away. He allowed himself to be moved.

Rose plastered a giant smirk onto her face. "Sorry Malfoy, but it's going to take more than a few of your smooth words to get me to pass through your door."

Scorpius' eyebrow went up.

Rose decided to torment Malfoy a little. She then leaned forward to whisper rather huskily into his ear. _"And you'll never manage to get my door open."_

With that, Rose moved away from Scorpius and walked back to her own room. Scorpius noticed that there seemed to be a little extra swing to her hips. With one rather blood-warming glance behind her and a wink, she walked into her own room and closed the door. The click of the lock was audible in the silent room.

Rose knew she'd laid it on a little thick, but didn't care. He deserved to be taunted with something he couldn't have.

Scorpius stood there, slack-jawed for a few moments. Then, Rose's words replayed in his head.

_And you'll never manage to get my door open._

Scorpius was no fool. He recognized a challenge when it spat upon his shoes. At least, that's how he saw it.

The gauntlet had been thrown down. And Scorpius had every intention of picking it up.

He couldn't keep the grin off of his face as he sauntered back to his own room, to begin pondering the best way to woo and win Rose Weasley.

_'I hope the other girls won't be too disappointed.'_ he thought as he closed his door.

* * *

EDIT: After reading a few reviews, it's clear that I cocked the end up. It's my fault for wording it poorly and not really proofreading it well. I'm going to change a few lines and hope it'll be a little more clear. My original idea was that Rose is repulsed by Malfoy and takes advantage of his admission, and that ego-man Malfoy would see it as a challenge and a real reason to give up his womanizing ways. And speaking of the womanizing ways, I consider my version of Malfoy here to still be kind of a sleaze, and if the one girl he actually thinks worthwhile wants nothing to do with him, it's probably not going to stop him from jumping from girl to girl until he thinks she might. Not that this is a really original idea or anything...sleazy, arrogant, womanizing Scorpius is well-explored at FFnet.

Well, that's it. If you liked it, or even if you hated it, why don't you let me know via review. I appreciate them!

I don't know why I put Pansy Parkinson's illegitimate daughter into Gryffindor. Just to get her closer to Albus I guess.

With John Cleese as a house ghost, how could 'Monty Python' not be a password at some point?

I made a semi-reference to one of my favorite comedy movies in this story. See if you can pick it out.

I didn't find writing sex scenes nearly as enjoyable as reading them. I doubt I'll do much more of them. I did use this opportunity to throw in a pet-peeve of mine about sexy stories though. No woman starts screaming actual whole words and such while she's orgasming. But, all fanfics seem to be written that way, like some text version of the famous Harry and Sally scene. Male fanfic writers, if your girl is screaming 'O GOD YESSSSS!' while you have sex, she's faking you out hard. Just an FYI.

While you're here, feel free to check out my other Rose/Scorpius stories, _I Hate Rose Weasley_ and _There's this Boy in Ravenclaw_. They aren't rated 'M'.

Thanks for reading!


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